It has happened to all of us at one time or another. Someone has broken our heart and all the talk, friends, ice cream, therapy sometimes don’t seem to be doing the trick because we want to feel better fast (that’s of course outside of the person coming back to beg forgiveness and admit he/she have been a complete fool). So what’s a person to do?
Well aside from all the advice you will receive through friends, relatives and millions of online resources, there are things you can do and things that really make you feel better for about 20 minutes and then you actually feel worse. So here’s it is:
What you don’t want to do:
-Drink too much. (We are talking alcohol.) Why? Because over-consumption of alcohol has a numbing effects initially, but then it lowers your blood sugar and your B-12 which actually makes you feel worse than you did before you served yourself that initial libation.
-Eat too much. If what you are eating is fruits and veggies (which is probably not the case) then you have no problem. If you are carb loading or sitting down to pint after pint of Ben and Jerry’s well that’s a problem. Too many carbs cause inflammation and too much sugar, well you’ve all heard of sugar crash.
-Stay in bed or turn on the tv and watching mind-numbing marathons of Law and Order or what ever your favorite sitecom? Why because actually the alpha waves created in the brain provoke a sort of hypnosis which actually deadens the brain. But it is still not resolving the problem.
-Allow yourself to go into deep depression. While it is important to allow yourself to feel pain, depression actually compromises your immune system. It is not strange that often when we are depressed for long periods of time we end up getting sick.
What you should do:
-Move!!! Everything from walking your dog, working in your garden, taking up a new project, going to meet friends and of course yoga. Why yoga? Because yoga works at multiple physiological, psychological and spiritual levels. When you get on your mat all those stretches and twists also cause your internal organs to move and squeeze fluids and fresh blood into your system. The outcome you feel better. Breathing of course is key because you are oxygenating your body and it will make you feel better. Plus, if you are focusing on the poses and focusing on the breath you are no longer focusing on your pain.
Here is a link to a Moving Prayer and Sun Salutation that will get you started. Check out Kathryn Budig: Moving Prayer
Unroll your yoga mat. Now. The power of yoga and intention is amazing. I want you to think of your body as a moving prayer. Set your intention at the beginning of your practice. If a home practice threatens you, simply repeat Sun Salutations and end with long holds in your hip openers. With each inhale, breathe in what you need, with each exhale breathe out any resistance to what you need, anything that does not serve you. Envision a ball of goodness surrounding you and supporting you. There is always support, we just need to be okay with asking for it, but the support starts with you. Do this practice everyday, even if only for five minutes. This daily prayer or meditation will begin to remind you what really matters in your life and help you get back on track.
-Eat well. Yes, that means healthy foods (veggies, fruits, sprouts, nuts) and lots and lots of water not only because of all the ice cream, alcohol and junk food you may have consumed, but because you really want to flush out your system.
-Get a massage. I don’t know what I would have done without my massage therapist when life was tough. He once explained to me that stress creates lactic acid inside the tissues and if not massaged out, these toxins eventually will turn into proteins (not the good kind) that will lead to disease. If you are on a budget I suggest you look into self-massage like abhyana and dry brushing using a natural bristle brush. Not only will you feel better, it also promotes lymphatic drainage and you will have beautiful luminous skin.
-Trust in your Higher Power. Yes, I know, so easy said than done. In my experience, there hasn’t been one time that I was dumped that down the road Ididn’t thanked my Higher Power for getting that person out of my life. Very often we are blinded by love, lust and/or infatuation so we are going around with these rose-colored glasses and refuse to see what is right in front of our nose. I saw this amazing t-shirt the other day that read: “Nobody is perfect until you are in Love.” Well, here are the facts: “Nobody is perfect…period!” In Deepak Chopras’ book, “The Way of the Wizard” he states that we all hate unpredictability but have benefited from it multiple times in our lives. So just trust. Trust that your life will be better. The pain does go away, I promise.
Sending love and healing…Namaste!